Anticipation Part 2

I stood and looked into my Master's eyes
my head was swimming...I want...I'm so grateful...
I want....I'm so so grateful!

"Go get your toy and bring it to me,
while you're there, grab the cuffs
and the straps"

I was fuzzy and excited and...
so not functioning very well.

I walked into the closet to get the cuffs and straps
and knelt down and just kind of stopped.

Sir walked into the closet and kept me moving.
I got the cuffs and straps,
then walked into the room.

I handed them to Master and he asked what toy I chose.
I said I had a question.  If I could choose, my first choice was
His hand, but if I had to choose something else, I'd choose a flogger.

He told me that His hand wasn't a toy, so to go grab the flogger.

I quickly got it and He told me to hold my hands out as He cuffed them.
It's amazing how I get this feeling of calm as He straps them on.
Then he has me raise my ankles up and he straps the cuffs on them as well.

Then he puts the handle of the crop in my hand and tells me to follow him.
He walks me out to the music room and commands me to lay over the piano bench.
He takes the crop from me and as I am laying down,
He puts the handle of the crop into my mouth

It acts like a bit gag in my mouth
I find it...panty-wettingly erotic!

He then straps my wrists to the legs of the one side of the bench.
He puts two pillows under my knees and then snicks the clips to my ankle cuffs together.
He takes the flogger from my mouth
and once again, I'm anticipating the lash of the flogger.
I love the flogger.

I chose the first flogger we had that Conina made for us...it's just luscious!

He began...and it was exactly as I remembered.
It thudded so perfectly.
I was breathing deeply and just enjoying.
It's almost like a message ...
... in the beginning

he started out flogging the left side for 9
then the right for 10
then the left for 11
then the right for 9
back and forth - but evening out...
getting to 100.

I'm almost panting as the intensity increases and
he begins to flog me in a figure 8 pattern...
hitting one side high and the other low and then
reversing the motion...it is harder on the whole.
Harder and harder and harder.

I can feel the wetness of my pussy...it's almost dripping at this point.
Master hits 400 way to fast...but fabulously wonderful

He finishes...takes the handle...puts it in my mouth
and walks away.
"You stay here."
I'm tied...like I'm going anywhere
"I'm going to make my lunch."
He leaves me there.
Naked.  Tied to a bench.  Flogger handle in my mouth.
OMG, I feel so submissive.
So at peace.
So objectified.
So adored.

He makes his lunch...My mind races
then calms.

He comes back in,
releases my wrists and unclicks my ankles.
Tells me to get up,
put the pillows in front of his chair
and wait...

anticipating...

...more.

Want

I want.

I want my Sir to come home to
and empty home
empty
except
for
me.

I want to be naked and kneeling
kneeling waiting to show my submission.

I want to have him claim me as his own.
To strip me bare
Cuff my hands and lay me over the side of the bed
putting my hands up over my head.

Him to grab the flogger
and begin...

begin to flog

begin to flog me lightly
up
    and
down

from my shoulders to my legs.

I want him to spread my legs wide
and
begin again
begin to flog

begin to flog me with more force
up
    and
down

then flog my pussy
and check.

Check my wetness.

Then begin again.
begin to flog me harder
much harder
up
    and
down
and over and over.

Then as my breathing shallows
as my breathing becomes more rapid...

I want him to take my hands
Roll me over
and
attach them to the bed frame,

touch me, rub me,
scratch me, pinch me...

and begin again...
begin to flog me lightly
up
    and
down

again
and
again.

Oh, I so want a very good flogging!

Fireworks

Sir and I were at a hotel recently
in a town with a river running through it.

We had gone away for the weekend with friends of ours.

We had a wonderful vanilla day of walking
festivals, fabulous food and lots of great conversation.

Very vanilla.

We got to our hotel room and Sir …

well…

He shifted, immediately.
From vanilla to all Dom!

He made quick work of stripping me,
laid me across the bed,
positioned me as he wanted,

and took his belt to my ass.

I was in heaven.

He warmed me up and then 
tanned me well and good.

My hips were writhing in short order and 
I was DRIPPING wet!

**POP**
**POP POP**

I asked if I could go to the window and see what that noise was.

Sir said yes.

I walked over to the window,
and as I was naked,
I carefully peeked my head out of the curtain
and low and behold,

There were fireworks going off over the river.

I gasped and told Sir.

He walked over and told me to open the curtains.

The lights were on in our room and 
though we were on the 7th floor,
I was completely naked
and visible to those in the hotel across the street 
as well as those on the street.

"Open it now, fiona." Sir commanded.

I carefully and shyly and desperately slowly
opened the window.

Sir put my hands against the window and 
pushed my nipples against the cold glass.

I gasped.

"Don't move, fiona."

He left me for a minute and I watched the fireworks go off.

I was so embarrassed.
I was SO EMBARRASSED!

I was lost in my head when
the next firework exploded over the river and 
**THWACK**

He flogged me…hard.

I just about came right there
…with that one strike!

No warm up on my back or ass.
He set in…hard and and fast…

He timed his hard strikes to the explosions of the fireworks.

The visual stimulation along with the physical stimulation…
it was overwhelming my senses in short order.

I came with fierce spasms
Shuddering and moaning and shivering!

I was naked, pressed up against the glass…
Lights illuminating everything and 

Sir flogged me to fireworks…
both visual and sexual!

Fantasy Fulfilled (Part 3)

This is continued from Part 1 & Part 2...more to come...

I am warm, comfortable, and calm.  I feel the enormous dildo in my pussy.   I am secure in my place and His.  As I am bound, collared, gagged and blindfolded, I am exactly how he wants me to be and exactly where he wants me to be.

I hear him walking down the hall.  I hear him open the door.  He walks over to me, pulls up his flannel shirt that was covering me and opens my legs.  He sits on the bed beside me and places a hand on my thigh, gently holding it in place.  Oh that hand is so gentile and comforting, yet wields the power take what he wants.  He begins to masturbate me slowly.

"Now fiona, I want you to tell me if you get sore.  Do you understand?  If you're sore, it's ok. I'll flip you over and use this in your ass.  Do you understand me, fiona?"

"uh-hu" I grunt through the ball gag.  Wow, that threat  statement, fills me with desire, deep and dark.  I simultaneously want him to use The Dildo in my ass and am terrified that I won't be able to take it - it's huge remember.  Oh, what is wrong with me?

He stands up, tells me to leave my legs butterflied.  *FUD*, he flogs my inner thighs.  He hits one and then the other.  Ah, it feels soooo good.  He moves so he's flogging my puss.  The small falls are tied in tiny knots.  They wheedle inside the folds of my pussy.  The larger knots hit my mound, my thigh, Ahhh.  He moves the falls upward and begins to flog my breasts.  It feels so good, but every time a large knot hits my nipple, my back flies off the bed.  It's like the clamps are being removed again.  They are so sensitive!  Oh, how I love to be flogged EVERYWHERE!  It's insane!

He puts the flogger down and leans in.   He sucks my nipple and it feels so good.  It feels like hot velvet engulfing my nipple.

He kneels on the bed and grabs my hair.  He pulls me up - as far as I can go given my restraints.  He pulls the ball gag out of my mouth and commands me to open my mouth.  He shoves his cock to the back of my throat and holds my head there.   As if I wasn't blazing before, I begin to suck like my life depended on it.  I am ravenous.  He reaches between my knees and moves the dildo in and out.  As he reaches a good pace with the dildo, he pulls my head on and off and is fucking my mouth at a pace that matches the dildo.  My mind goes blank and that electric surge, that starts in my core - moves quickly to my fingers and toes begins.  The electricity of my climax then surges through my limbs to my pussy and all of my energy flows to my pleasure points.   I feel so humiliated, so objectified, so used and taken and controlled.  Oh, how I love this!

*KNOCK*   *KNOCK*   *KNOCK*

ARE  YOU
F  U  C  K  I  N  G
KIDDING ME?????

He quickly sets me back down, pushes the dildo far into my pussy, zips up his pants, and walks to the door.  With an evil tone to his voice, he tells me not to move and giggles under his breath.

AARRGGHH!!

Fantasy Fulfilled (Part 1)

Sir and I had a very LONG playtime and I wanted to capture it (for me and for y'all.) 
It's going to be in four shorter parts.  Sorry for the length.

I dressed for Sir this morning in a long wrap-around skirt, sexy thong, spaghetti strapped tank, sweater and three inch heals.  We ran errands, completely mundane life-stuff.  We went to the grocery store, the pet store, dropped the car to be serviced...yep, NOTHING sexy.  All the time I was walking outside or getting in and out of the car, I was a bit chilly in my thong and bare legs with cool air blowing up my skirt and onto my freshly shaved skin.

We got home and his look hardens.  Oh how I love that look.  "Go upstairs, get undressed and get out my box."  Well I scurry upstairs, relishing in the knowledge that we are alone in our home and he wants to play....with me!  I take off my heels and sweater.  I am looking for some music to put on when he opens the bedroom door.  "Well, you didn't make it very far, fiona."  I explain that I was looking for music and he cuts me off, pushes me flat on the bed, pulls up my skirt, and unceremoniously spanks me.  He doesn't warm up, he's hard and fast.  Just ten, but they are meaningful!
  

"Did I ask you to put on music?"  He asks.  

     "no, Sir," I sheepishly respond.

"Listen, fiona.     Be a good girl.      Take off your clothes."
     SPANK
"Get my box."
     SPANK
"Pick up your things, put them away, and Bend,"
     SPANK
"Over,"
     SPANK
"The"
     SPANK
"Bed."
     SPANK.  

The beautiful AND amazing feeling floggers!

"Yes, Sir." I say more confidently and immediately whirl around and comply.  I hang my clothes and put my shoes away and take out a flogger-box and lay over the side of the bed.  When he walks back over to me he picks up the box and opens it and with no further ado, begins to flog me.  He's flogging florentine - his and my first time and I must say it's impactful, both physically and emotionally (in all the best ways).  I know that's not a great adjective, but it's accurate. 

"Are these new?"  he asks.

OF COURSE THEY'RE NEW...
YOU KNOW WHAT WE OWN - I scream in my head.   

I purchased them as a gift for him and was waiting for the right time to give them to him.  I am rather addicted to Conina's floggers.  Her floggers have featured prominently in our play for a while, though this is our first twin set for florentine!

The flogs are coming quickly and my body is busy breathing, moaning,  listening, processing, and producing the juices of my arousal, I simply have no more threads available for speech.  

He stops and asks his question again.  He waits a minute, flogs one set - HARD, stops, then asks again.

"Yes, Sir," I manage to whisper.  

"Did you ask to purchase these?"  What??  Readers should know this is not part of our dynamic.  He does not restrict what I purchase nor when I purchase it.

"No, Sir.  I bought them as a gift for you.  Should I not have?  I'm sorry, Sir"

"Oh, fiona.  You should always ask before you make purchases like these."

"but I do like them." he says almost as an afterthought and quickly begins to flog again.  

Knots of all different sizes

Oh, it's hard, it's painful - but not too.  It's a deeper thud than usual, maybe due to the millions of knots in the falls.  Because two floggers are hitting me, their impacts are coming quickly and are reaching deep inside me, almost like a deep tissue massage upon each impact. I'm breathing, raising up, wanting more, breathing, moaning, crying out, panting.   There are falls that are unraveled and their tiny knots find their way into tiny folds.  You don't have to use much imagination to imagine what happens when he's not simply flogging on each cheek.  As he moves to one flogger and begins to be more centrally located I raise to my tip-toes to reach closer to him.  I want, I want...  Oh how I want more!

Kinky Vanilla

Well, I read a post by Kitty about Vanilla Sex.  Her post made me thing about vanilla in my life.

Sir and I had PLENTY of vanilla sex in our 20+ years.  We've always had a great sex life...sleeping together (in the biblical sense), typically, 3-4 times a week.  We've been best friends from our first night together.  No, there was no sex that night...just talking.  ALL night.  We saw sunset and sunrise.  We've made love in many positions and gone to sleep sated, happy, and connected.  There was nothing wrong with our vanilla sex life.

My First Pair of Handcuffs

With all that said, we started with kink in our relationship, to some degree, but never named it as kink.  Within the first few months of sleeping together, we spanked.  I loved being spanked.  I can't remember the first dildo that he bought or the first vibe, but I've had them a long time.  I purchased our first pair of handcuffs and gave them to him as a gift over 20 years ago.  They weren't the pink fuzzy ones, they were metal police type cuffs and oh, was I in!  I have loved bondage and rarely, if ever, get my fill.  We've had crops and floggers and clamps...you get the idea.

We've had kink AND vanilla for as long as we've had us.  But the vanilla has historically been along side the kink, some nights this and some nights that.  As I have blogged before, our kink became more focused a little over a year ago.  Where we had been forever switches, we became D/s with sole-positions of D and s.  So for a year we've been settling into our roles.  As the months go by, the vanilla seems to appear less and less in our sex-life.  Now-a-days, the periodic blow job instead of a face fucking - meaning no hands in my hair, no loss of control, no force, is the closest we typically get to vanilla sex.

I have tried to initiate making love to my husband a couple of times.  We typically evolve into D/s - where I am clearly giving my power over and he is clearly taking my power and HE is in charge.

So I sit here, typing this post and am contemplating where we are.
       Do I miss it? 
              Do I miss the vanilla?  
       Am I not making love when we are sleeping together with our D/s in full view?  
Do we not connect on the same level when there are the trappings of bondage, toys, spankings?

I am LOVING my kink.  I don't miss the vanilla in my sex-life.  I do not miss it, because
       

I have vanilla inside my kink.  

• From each tender kiss to every loving spank.  
• From each sappy phone conversation that begins with an equally husband-specified sappy ring-tone to each tug, bite and clamp of my nipple. 
• From each snuggle, spooning close at night to each flog as his hand rests strong and sure against my back.  
• From each dinner conversation and parenting moment to every whisper of ownership in my ear.  

I love my kink AND I love the vanilla that lives within...

and I don't feel incomplete at all.

SAD

The sky on November 5, 2011, the day she died.

Warning:  NOTHING Sexy or Hot 

written here.  Just life – real life…

I am sad.  Profoundly sad.  Last year was noteworthy on the tragic side for me.  I lost.  I lost friends, I lost family, I lost familiarity, I lost.  You know how they have those tests for stress and they include; death, divorce, change in job, change in location... - well, I didn't get divorced.  

I have had a good year since then, overall.  I have grieved and grown.  But today.  Today is hard.  Today is sad.   One year ago today, I lost the person I was closest to in this world, next to my husband.  I lost the most precious person who knew me since I was born.  I knew this day would be hard and, indeed, many tears have been shed and the hole in my heart and soul is still large. 

The sky the evening I put her in the ground.

I had asked my love, my husband, my Sir to be here on this day, as I knew it would be hard.  I asked many moons ago…and this is not something I really ever do.  He planned on being here and at the last minute – well a couple of weeks ago, he had to set up a business trip on this day (yesterday and tomorrow too).  I was despondent when he told me – feeling sad and betrayed and alone.  Now, I do realize, in the cold light of day, that it may be a little way too dramatic  to go there…but at the moment it was real.  

I asked him on Saturday to please spank me - really spank me, and make sure I was in as good of a place as I could be in before he left.  He promise to do just that.  Guess what…life happened.  I went up to our room and he did too.  We packed and he fell asleep.  I was … you guessed it … sad and frusterated and angry.  I cried, silent tears, not that it would have mattered, he was asleep.  I moved over to the side of the bed furthest away from him.  I tried to sleep, but couldn’t .  After a bit of time too long, I decided I wasn’t punishing him by sleeping far away and distancing myself.  I snuggled up and put myself in the position that is our ritual rule.  I slid off into dream land.  

*slap*

I awoke to a swift smack of his hand on my ass, then rubbing -  Ohh Ohhh.  He spanked me awake and then kissed me.  It was the middle of the night, just prior to him having to leave.  He got out the flogger and flogged.  He told me the last few would be hard – he had to make them count as he said.  They were HARD – they counted.  He kissed me and gave me directions…things to do.  I was to stay plugged for specific periods of time, to do specific things around the house...he was trying to help me stay focused and not fall apart.  He has been calling and being attentive.  I am grateful for his help.  I am grateful for his love.  I am grateful for what I have…

... but I am still at a loss.  I am still sad.  I am still broken hearted.  Today is hard and I am sad.  

He Flogs ...100 ... 200 ...

Yep, this is one of my beautiful
Floggers made by Conina

We were in the bedroom getting ready for bed;  Bathroom, getting towels for morning showers, morning clothes, picking up dirty laundry, talking about this and that.  I quietly close the door while he was in the bathroom, hoping he doesn't hear it lock.  He was getting out floss and I lay, naked, over the side of the bed.  This is my sign that I need, not want, NEED a spanking.  He walks in to change the television channel, floss in hand and sees me.

"Get the flogger for me, then lay back down and don't move," he commands without missing a beat.  Oh how I love that he doesn't miss a beat.  He changes the channel and then proceeds to floss his teeth.

I get the flogger, shown on the right, the one with the knots in it so that it packs a bit more of a punch (all puns intended).  I need that tonight.  I need more intensity.  I lay the flogger next to me as I lay back across the bed, on the balls of my feet, back flat with my hands stretched across the bed.  I wait and breathe.  He flosses his teeth and I hear him getting his toothbrush.  He walks in, I can't see him, but can hear him brushing his teeth behind me.

"AAaahhhh!"  I say in surprise - I hadn't heard him pick up the flogger.  It doesn't hurt, but simply surprises me.

He brushes his teeth and flogs.  It is somehow a bit more exciting because he seems to be flogging his slut as an afterthought...like it simply goes along with something as pedestrian as brushing his teeth.  Just... getting ready for bed.

He flogs me! Changing the location of the strike only slightly.  He flogs!  He is aiming for my ass...not my thighs or back...just my ass. He flogs!   Now as I have a not-unsubstancial ass, there is a bit of space for variation - but not very much.  He flogs!  He changes the intensity of the strike.  He flogs!   He changes where on the falls it hits - weather it is mostly knots or knots pulling across the silky tails.  He flogs!

...He flogs!
...He flogs!

Somewhere around 200 and I am slipping.  My breathing, that had been more like panting, more like moaning, more ... just more ... suddenly becomes quiet.  My body which had been moving on the bed, exploring the sensations, asking for more, meeting the flogger in invitation for another strike, stills.  I slip.  I quiet.  I absorb, I am lost - no I am FOUND!  I am content, feeling each strike but only externally.  My mind is quiet, I am calm, I feel safe, surrounded by ... surrounded by ... space.

He stops at 300.  I can feel my ass heating the entire room.  There may have been a thermal spike in the town we live in, I don't know.  He walks around the bed, moves my hands and lays down.   He pulls his hand to his cock.  I touch, I stroke, I rub.  He gives me time to find myself.

"May I climb onto the bed, please Sir?"  I ask.

"Yes." he says.  "You needed that didn't you?"

"Oh, Yes, Sir!  Thank you, Sir." And my mouth devours him.  "Take your hand, fiona.  Hold me."  he commands.  I know him to mean that I am to hold and play with his balls while I suck.  Oh, the veins.  I love feeling his throbbing veins on his cock.  Feeling the blood pumping through him.  I love the strength of his cock and the feel of him pushing down my throat.  I love how slick and smooth it is after he has shoved down my throat several times.  Oh, do I love my Sir's manhood.

"When is the last time you swallowed for me, fiona?" He asks, knowing it's been a couple of weeks.  "boo bwong!" is my reply with my mouth around him.  "Come here, I want you to taste yourself, when you taste me."  He says as he grabs me and pulls me up.  I lower down onto him and he fucks for only a few minutes then pushing me back down.  I lick his balls, suck on them for a minute, then replace my mouth with my hand as I move to take his cock back into my mouth.  I suck, he pumps.  His hand grabs and pulls my hair, controlling my head, defining the pace, fucking my mouth.  I can taste... me, I can taste my wetness on him.  He cums and I suck, I lick, I savor. I hold it all.  I revel in every moment.

After he is all spent, I open my mouth to show him his gift.  "Oh, fiona.  You ARE a good girl.  Now swallow!"

mmmmmmmmm

A Blog For A Flog

I started this blog with the blessing of Sir.  I showed him the blog prior to any content being written.  I asked if he wanted to view any posts before I published them, to which he said, "No." So I have published a few posts - and I had told him that I had done them.  He had said that he wanted to read them, but then life happened.  He promised to read it yesterday when we came home.  We came home from running errands and he immediately started watching a game on TV.  I did not want to nag him, but I was very frustrated.  I huffed, I sulked, I was irritated and disappointed.  When I realized that I was being petulant, I walked over to him, knelt before him, placed my head on his lap and said I was sorry.  I immediately felt my submission and knew that was where I was supposed to be.  He stroked my head and held it to him.  When I began to get up, he held me in place and my stomach dropped.  He wasn't ignoring me, he was doing what HE wanted to do, when HE wanted to do it.  When the game ended, he turned off the TV and simply said, "Bed, now" and pointed.

I stood up and as I started walking, he told me to get the computer and the flogger.

As I came into our room, I set the computer in the middle of the bed and went to get the flogger.  I came in, he held out his hand, took the flogger and he told me to 'assume the position.'  Now I know when he has a spanking implement, that 'position' he refers to is me, naked, bent over the side of the bed.  He lay in the middle of the bed with me over the side behind him.  He was ignoring me - again!  Argh.

He was quietly looking at the computer and I couldn't see him, see his face, tell what he was thinking.  I was sooo nervous, worried, embarrassed, uncertain, anxious.  Oh why did I think I could start a blog.  Why did I think this was a good idea.  What was I thinking?  I close my eyes and focus on my breathing in an effort to calm my nerves.

He shuts the computer screen, gets off the bed and walks around.  He tells me to give him my hand.  Is he going to hit my hand?  Is he unhappy?  Did he find it displeasing?

ZZZZZ   He unzips his pants?

He places his very hard cock in my hand and says, "I like what you wrote."

He liked it?  OH - he like it!

He steps away from my hand and then OUWW!  I forgot he had the flogger.  He doesn't warm up, he simply flogs - VERY HARD over my ass. It is very thuddy.  My breathing is picking up, moaning more while he's getting harder with each swing.  It's almost like he is flogging something two feet on the other side of my ass.  WOW breathe it's breathe intense breathe.  I'm breathing harder, my head is beginning to get fuzzy.

"Spread your legs. NOW," he says and begins to flog my thighs and OH - my pussy.  Wow - the flogger is wrapping around.  OH OH - it's hitting, Aaahhh - it hit my clit.  My breathing is so fast - all I hear is keening and panting - from me!

"Roll over and get up on my bed," he says - still flogging my legs.  Keeping my eyes closed, I roll over onto my back and scoot, very ungracefully, to the middle of the bed.  Without missing a beat he continues to flog me.  He's flogging my stomach, my breasts.  The falls land on my nipples and I can feel them hardening even further.  Ahhh - how I love to have my breasts flogged.

He is still clothed, and I am naked.  My skin is so sensitized.  He mounts me and his clothes feel so abrasive.  He fucks - hard, slamming into me.  Oh his cock is so hard and - AAHH.  With one hand he cups my breast and then pulls at my nipple.  He rolls and twists as he pumping into me.  Just as he pinches very hard, I open my eyes WIDE with a Holy Hell sort of look.  He grabs the back of my neck and spins me so he is under me and pulls my ear to his mouth.  With his free hand he pushes me down onto him and he pumps up to make an sound impact.

"Tell me," he says.  I'm breathing so hard and feeling overwhelmed with sensation.

"TELL ME!"  he says.  Oh he's talking to me!

He's holding my head in place and spanking my ass with his free hand.  What on EARTH is he talking about?  He does this sometimes and I have NO idea how to form a single coherent thought, let alone what I should be thinking about telling him.

"Tell me what you are!"  -  spank
"TELL ME" - Spank SPANK

breathe, fiona.  breathe.  Shit, no,  I mean speak fiona.  Speak!

I whisper, "yours" on an exhale.

"What are you??"

"Yours," I say in a whisper, but with a little more intent.

"Good Girl," he says then continues with a growl,  "you are MINE!"

With that, I arch my back and scream, throwing my head, he releases my hair and I cum.  I can feel my pussy clenching around his cock.  He must be able to feel it pulsing too, because he cums - loudly.  There is very little that is more amazing than hearing Sir cum LOUDLY.

I feel his cock pulsing in answer to my pussy.

He grabs my back and holds me to him.

"I love you," I say to him.  "I love you too - and fiona, you are MINE!" he repeats.   In response to his statement, I roll off, bend over and clean his beautiful, hard cock with my mouth - affirming that indeed,
I AM HIS!

oh - and he LIKED my blog (YEA!!)