Kinky Vanilla

Well, I read a post by Kitty about Vanilla Sex.  Her post made me thing about vanilla in my life.

Sir and I had PLENTY of vanilla sex in our 20+ years.  We've always had a great sex life...sleeping together (in the biblical sense), typically, 3-4 times a week.  We've been best friends from our first night together.  No, there was no sex that night...just talking.  ALL night.  We saw sunset and sunrise.  We've made love in many positions and gone to sleep sated, happy, and connected.  There was nothing wrong with our vanilla sex life.

My First Pair of Handcuffs

With all that said, we started with kink in our relationship, to some degree, but never named it as kink.  Within the first few months of sleeping together, we spanked.  I loved being spanked.  I can't remember the first dildo that he bought or the first vibe, but I've had them a long time.  I purchased our first pair of handcuffs and gave them to him as a gift over 20 years ago.  They weren't the pink fuzzy ones, they were metal police type cuffs and oh, was I in!  I have loved bondage and rarely, if ever, get my fill.  We've had crops and floggers and clamps...you get the idea.

We've had kink AND vanilla for as long as we've had us.  But the vanilla has historically been along side the kink, some nights this and some nights that.  As I have blogged before, our kink became more focused a little over a year ago.  Where we had been forever switches, we became D/s with sole-positions of D and s.  So for a year we've been settling into our roles.  As the months go by, the vanilla seems to appear less and less in our sex-life.  Now-a-days, the periodic blow job instead of a face fucking - meaning no hands in my hair, no loss of control, no force, is the closest we typically get to vanilla sex.

I have tried to initiate making love to my husband a couple of times.  We typically evolve into D/s - where I am clearly giving my power over and he is clearly taking my power and HE is in charge.

So I sit here, typing this post and am contemplating where we are.
       Do I miss it? 
              Do I miss the vanilla?  
       Am I not making love when we are sleeping together with our D/s in full view?  
Do we not connect on the same level when there are the trappings of bondage, toys, spankings?

I am LOVING my kink.  I don't miss the vanilla in my sex-life.  I do not miss it, because
       

I have vanilla inside my kink.  

• From each tender kiss to every loving spank.  
• From each sappy phone conversation that begins with an equally husband-specified sappy ring-tone to each tug, bite and clamp of my nipple. 
• From each snuggle, spooning close at night to each flog as his hand rests strong and sure against my back.  
• From each dinner conversation and parenting moment to every whisper of ownership in my ear.  

I love my kink AND I love the vanilla that lives within...

and I don't feel incomplete at all.

Spanked Un-grumpy

I'm grumpy.

He grabs my ponytail and pushes me across the bed.  I DO NOT want to be spanked.  I'm grumpy.  He moves his hand from hair and pushes my lower back across the bed.  "I don't want to be spanked!"  I tell him.  He grabs the wooden hairbrush which happens to have been on the nightstand.  

   He spanks.  "No, I don't want this," I protest and tense.

   He spanks.  "no."

My whole body is tensed.

   He spanks.

   He spanks.

My body begins to soften.

   He spanks. "Ohhhh," I moan.

SHIT - I didn't mean to moan.  I don't want this to work.  I don't want a spanking.  I'm grumpy.

   He spanks.  

   He spanks.

   He spanks.

And in one instant, I feel it.  

My body melts.  I begin to pant.  I feel, actually feel, all of my tension leave my body.  My muscles go slack.  My mind goes blank.  My mood shifts.  I am focused on his spanking, on my breathing, on where I am right now, in this moment.  

   He spanks.

I have the most ridiculous smile on my face and life is good.
Me grumpy?  No-way!!

Bite, Slap, Whimper

My self help group for one:
Hello, my name is fiona, and I love to bite my Sir's lip (even though I know it's not appropriate.)

*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * 

So, I know I'm not supposed to bite my Sir's lip.  I know this.  I know when I do there are consequences.  But here's the thing. I love to - like really LOVE to!  I don't bite so hard that it really hurts (that's my story), but I love how it feels.  I also know, it is NEVER acceptable.

So, yep, you betcha...dumb ass fiona did just that.  I was kissing Sir in the laundry room and GENTLY bit his lip and

**SMACK**

right across my face.  Now I was expecting that I would not be able to get a way with it, but that was unexpected.  It was quick and sharp and ... shocking.  I put my head down and quickly turned away.  He grabbed my hair and pulled me immediately up against him and began to kiss me.  

I felt ashamed and guilty, I knew what I did was, not the end of the world, but not appropriate.  I didn't open my mouth.  I didn't want gentile affection.  He kissed, his tongue gently probing and pushing past my lips.  He was kissing me tenderly but firmly.  I opened my mouth ever so slightly as my body betrayed my brain.  His tongue took advantage of the opening.  He was exploring my mouth and holding me safely and strongly in his arms.  He was possessing me - loving me.  It was heady.  That mix of 

                correction + forgiveness + connection.

I could still feel the sting of his slap.  The kiss broke and he held my head against his chest and hugged me firmly.  I felt his strong body pressed against me.  Oh, I felt enveloped and safe.  

"You needed that, didn't you?"  he said.  No contempt, no teasing, simply a question.  
I buried my face in his chest and whispered, "yes, sir."

"You are going to be a good girl."  Once again, no contempt, no teasing, simply a statement.

He hugged me, released me and I turned to go.  I make it to the door and once again grabs my hair and hauls me up against him.  He grabs my hand with his free hand and pushes it against him.  I can feel him, his manhood, his rock-hard cock - pressing so hard against his jeans.  

I whimper and melt.  AHHhhhhh

Thanks for the Conversation

I love that I get to have a conversation every day, every few days, every week or two with the bloggers on my blogroll.  That's the way I feel about it.  We have a conversation.  I share what's happening in my life (albeit often my sex-life).  I read about what's happening in yours.  I leave comments on your blogs and you comment back and vice-versa.  It's a conversation among friends.

I never thought I would find a community like this.  I never thought I would fit into an online blogging community.  I have read for a while, commented for a bit and am a baby-blogger.  None of these were things I thought would be things that I did.  And yet, I find myself enjoying and feeling "nourished" by the online community that I belong to.

So I wanted to say THANK YOU.  Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your conversation, a part of your life.  But just as importantly, THANK YOU for being a part of mine.

Spanked to the Rhythm of the Beat

I knew tonight would be a stressful evening.  About thirty minutes before the arrival of guests, my Sir tells me to go upstairs.  He turns on music and a song I love, "Little Talks" by Of Monsters and Men, comes on the speakers.

Laying over the bed, with my feet on the floor and my hands stretched over my head, he puts his hand on my back and pushes firmly down.  He takes the hairbrush and begins to spank lightly.  He spanks hard at times.  I notice, quite quickly, he's following the percussive rhythm of the song.

Yes, the actual weapons brushes he used.

Smack smack smack smack Smack smack Smack smack
SMACK (on Hey - if you know the song)
Smack smack smack smack Smack smack Smack smack

It is very rapid and the lighter smacks act almost like rubbing.  It is sensual and rhythmic and messaging.

The Smacks are harder, more of a staccato.  They give a quick, sharp and biting sting, but when immediately followed by the gentle smacks fade into loveliness.

The SMACKs for the "Hey"s of the song are sound and firm, reaching through to my core.  Once again, though, because they are followed so quickly by the gentle smacks, they melt into me.

By the end of the song, he says he wants to look at me and stands back and admires the lovely shades of red that he has painted.

I am ready for ANYTHING.

Liebster Award

I was nominated by aisha  for The Liebster Award.  Here are rules...

• When one receives the award, one posts 11 random facts about oneself and answers the 11 questions asked by the person who nominated you.
• Pass the award onto 11 other blogs (while making sure one notifies the blogger that one nominated them!)
• One writes up 11 NEW questions directed towards YOUR nominees.
• One is not allowed to nominate the blog who nominated one’s own blog!
• One pastes the award picture into one’s blog. (You can google the image, there are plenty of them!)

Here are the 11 random facts:

1.  I am a total geek - LOVE math and science.

2.  My favorite color is blue...I love almost all shades of blue except teal.

3.  I am very adventurous and willing to do most everything, though sometimes I need a bit of coaxing.

4.  On the coaxing front, I love to dance, but it usually requires the addition of alcohol for me to dance in front of non-family members.

5.  I love coffee and hot apple cider in the winter, but also drink milk every day.

6.  I love to drive very fast..it's more of a sport to me.

7.  I love to travel and would go ANYWHERE!  

8.  I love dogs and kids.

9.  I grow out my hair so that I can cut it off and donate it to locks of love, then grow it back.

10.  Peppermint ice-cream rocks my world!

11.  Although I love water, I hate very deep water where I can't see what's below me.

Here are the questions I need to answer for aisha:

1.  Who was your most important role model?  

My husband, Sir is my most important role model (for the past 22 years)

2.  What’s your favorite meal?

Tacos de Camerones, guacamole and fried ice cream

3.  What one food would you NEVER eat?

Veal, Brains, Eyes, Intestines and the like.

4.  What do you like best about being kinky?

How it makes me feel...SO alive...so connected...so in love...so loved

5. Do you have a hobby?  What is it?

Photography, but it may be an obsession more than a hobby.

6.  Is there a sexual position you haven’t tried that you’d like to?

hmmm, there's a whole karma-sutra-of-positions I haven't tried that may be fun.

7.  When was the last time you danced with someone?

This afternoon.

8.  Were you in a clique in high school?  Which one?

I was, in the Geeks, the Jocks and the Rebels.

9.  If you could live in any time era, which one would you pick, and why?

A toss up between Now and the Victorian Age.

10.  Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex?  Why?

I prefer giving oral sex because I adore sucking on my Sir's cock.  Now that doesn't mean that I don't like him going down on me.

11.  If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

Ireland or Germany.

Here are the questions I would like you to answer:

1.  What's your favorite implement for spanking?

2.  What is your favorite dessert?

3.  What's your favorite toy in your arsenal?

4.  What is your favorite sport (whether to play or watch)?

5.  City life or country life?

6.  What's your favorite pair of shoes?

7.  Are you with a significant other?  If so, for how long?

8.  Swallow, spit or pull out?  (either you do or have your partner do)

9.  What would your motto be?

10.  Most interesting class you ever took in school?

11.  Describe your kink in 11 words or less.

11 nominated blogs

The Liebster award is for blogs that have fewer than 200 followers, {according to the internet.} I also had to make sure not to include the folks that aisha had already nominated.  Aisha posted later that some disagreed with choosing others to award - that it was showing favoritism.  I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do given the conflicting input...so I went with the original directions...here are 11 - in no particular order :)

~ The Dish with Ward and June with Ward and June ~ I count this a TWO because they BOTH always post.  I have loved hearing both of their perspectives on so many things.  Both on the day to day life that happens and their wonderful connections.

~ New Life in DD with Bas ~ Bas is wonderfully real.  He lets us in on his life and his love.  He is very frank and honest and helpful. 

~ Exploring Surrender with Conina ~ Holy Scorcher.  She is a wonderful writer!  She and her husband know and embrace their kink and it is ... um ... exciting to peek inside.

~ Bright Bottom with Spanky ~ I love Spanky's pictures.  I love his interview with fondles and look forward to fairie's and of course his organization of CWS.

~ Life Under a Firm Hand with Mrs. Soft Bottom ~ She and Mr. FH have such a normal life.  It's wonderful to hear about kids ups and downs, their struggles and successes.  He is certainly embracing his inner-Dom and it's fun to come along for the ride.

~ Joey and Friends with Joey ~  Joey is the best of Spankos.  His adventures in spanking are inspiring!  It's fun to live vicariously :)

~ Smiling Belle's Journey with Belle ~  Belle is upbeat and makes me smile (as her title intones).  She provides vanilla life - romantic posts, posts about kids, and kinky posts that give us something oh so hot!

~ the Life of Liz with Liz ~ I love to hear about Grandma getting ready to move in, the craziness with the kids as well as delicious spankings and fun that ensues.

~ The world of Joolz with Joolz ~  I look forward to her adventures.  They are so well planned and push so many limits and are H..H...Ho...HOT!  But I have even enjoyed her 30 days of submission and day to day insights.

~ What does it mean to be Dominant? with Sir J ~  He is so insightful.  I love his posts and have learned a lot about the D side of things.  That sounds so cliche, but I really have gleamed a lot from his insights.  Incidentally, some of his posts are extremely ... combustible.

Pacified

Last night was a first.   We were lounging in our bed and he was laying diagonally across it.  I rubbed his feet and we talked.  When I was done, we finished our conversation and I leaned down.  I got comfortable and began exploring my Sir.  With my mouth on his cock; sucking, licking, kissing. I was taking my time, lavishing his hardness with a slow, gentile, exploring, enjoying, dare I say worshiping blow job.  It was lovely.  I was content in my service.

...

      time passes

....

I am very comfortable, my breathing slow.  I lay my head on the top of his thigh at his groin and just suck - gently suck.

...

      time passes

....

It's dark and silent.  My cheek is warm, my body is tangled with Sir's.  I am safe.  Instinctively, rhythmically, I suck.

      ***Oh My God***

I was giving Sir head!

      ***Oh My God***

I have his cock IN MY MOUTH!

I don't move my head, my body or my mouth.  My tongue has created a suction with his cock and the roof of  my mouth.  My tongue doesn't release his cock.  I suck, my tongue undulating against his length.  I close my eyes and drift.  He has pacified me.

Not Just in the Bedroom

Growth.  I have found such peace, contentment, happiness, eroticism and ecstasy in my submission.  As I grow in my submission, Sir grows in his Dominance.  He pushes my limits and explores my submission, and not just when we are in our bedroom.

We were staying with vanilla friends of ours this past weekend.  Now, typically, I have been a very opinionated, sometimes challenging, often cheeky wife.  I have found that though I still very freely share my opinion, I am much more respectful and much less cheeky than I used to be.  I like that.  I am proud of that.  I feel better about myself, that I am learning to speak my mind in a respectful way.  

I wanted to share two small things which had a huge effect on my psyche, among other things.  At one point my Sir and our friend were talking in the living room.  He asked me to do a couple of things - both of which were very reasonable.  I did them and when I came back, he told me in a very normal voice, "You are such a good wife, aren't you?"  Our friend glanced at me, as this was out of character.  Typically Sir wouldn't have made a comment like that and if had done anything similar, I would typically have some response that ranged from very cheeky to scathing.  I would have liked to ignore his statement, but darned if he didn't ask me a question, making it so I had to answer.  As my pussy clenched and stomach did a somersault, I smiled and looked at him and said, "I hope so."  Our friend smiled at me, then went back to his discussion with Sir.  I was flooded with emotion.  I loved the affirmation that I was a good wife.  I was mortified loved that he said it even though our friend was there.  I was so content, happy, gratified, excited, turned-on, proud, satisfied.  

I looked at him later, when we were alone, and said, "You're getting more brazen."  He looked at me, pulled my hair tight (which of course pulls that invisible string inside of me) and whispered into my ear (which electrifies me) and said, "You need that, don't you?"  I just melted.

YES I DO!

Later that night, we had been out with some friends.  We were getting ready to go into a bar and I was annoyed (not with him).  We were walking in last and right there, on the sidewalk, he grabbed my hair, pulled me back two steps and gripped tight.  He once again whispered in my ear.  "Be Good!  You.  Are.  Mine.  I want you to be a good girl.  Do *pulls hair* you *pulls hair* understand *pulls hair* me *pulls hair*?"  What is a good girl to do?  "Yes, Sir" I say immediately.  I am back, I am reset, I am compliant, I am his and I can do anything!   Oh, I may be a bit wet too =)

Oh how I love TTWD!  Oh, how I love my Sir!

Help Needed

So, Blogland...I need your help.

My Sir has asked me to research two items which he would like to acquire.  I have asked Jake because I love his product reviews.  He has given me some advice, but I wanted to expand my knowledge.  Please comment or e-mail me if you have ANYTHING to add (recommendations or warnings.)

     1.  Remote Controle Vibe/Egg

• Must have a wireless remote
• Must be able to produce strong vibrations
• Insertable

     2.  Electro-Stimulous

• I believe he's wanting a violet wand...but don't know anything about them.
• Recommendations on attachments?

I appreciate your help fellow blog-readers!  Thank you in advance for ANY information you wish to share!

LOL 7 + First Month-a-versary!

Thank you Bonnie for organizing!!

So I'm new...only been at the ONE MONTH TODAY!!! 

Happy Month-a-versary Me!

So...I've only been a non-lurker for a about five months.  I lurked for a very long time.  Then, I agonized about making my first comment.  You know what they say about flood gates, then commented on everything I could.  I loved the connection I started building with the bloggers of the blogs I loved.  Then...upon the suggestion of a blogger that I commented on regularly...I took the leap and ... Wa-la.   Here I am....a blogger (what - how did that happen?)

As it's only been a month, I know I don't have many lurkers out there.  But if there are any of you out there, I would truly love to meet you.  I know you may not know what to say...so here are some possibilities:

1.  What is your favorite name 
2.  What is your favorite color
           (I was about to say..."What is the air-speedvelocity of an unladen swallow?")
3.  What is your favorite book, song, or movie - ALWAYS looking for new artists/movies/books!!!
4.  Just simply say - "Hi - I'm here!"

I am grateful that you come and read about my slice of life.  

fiona
(1 Month Old)

Spanked AND Broken

We had such an unfortunate turn of events.  Last night, as I was laid over the bed - and yes - he LAID me over the bed - he was trying make a point and ... WA-LA... Point made!

Then HE says to me, "YOU broke MY brush!"
(I was such a good girl and did not say the myriad of things which popped into my head)

A Slap in the Face

A slap in the face elicits such a depth of emotions.  I know that face slapping is VERY controversial. People either love it or hate it.  It can conjure up bad tapes from our youth or relationships which weren't healthy in some way.

Two things to keep in mind about this issue and me.  First, until we explored him slapping me in an erotic way (yes, it is erotic for me), I had never been smacked.  Therefore, I had none of those bad tapes or unhealthy relationships with regard to face slapping.    It was something that I was neither excited about or opposed to.  Second, my Sir and I have been together for over 20 years.  Yep, been together... FOREVER!  In that time, we've always pushed each other's limits.  It's funny to think that there are any left.

I don't know when the first time was that Sir slapped me.  I know I asked hinted that I was interested in it.  I believe he was apprehensive about slapping me.  I find that kind of funny because he has NO qualms with so many other things.  He spanks me, flogs me, whips me, pinches me.  He clamps, binds, and fucks me in a myriad of ways.  He's not ever seemed to have a problem with degrading or humiliating me.  He's not struggled with our power exchange.  While he has been gentile at times he has also been rough, very rough.  But this...smacking my face... he seemed to struggle more with.

The first few times he would smack me, it was a very light tap on the cheek.  It wasn't just ok with me, it was a turn on.  But I wanted more.  I continued to ask hint for more.  Sadly, looking back, I don't think I ever really asked.  I felt ashamed that I liked it so much.  You know, that old feeling that something must be wrong with me if I like this.  So much of society tells us that smacking someone's face is wrong.  Society often says it is inappropriate in ALL circumstances.

The first time he smacked me - really smacked me - open hand, firm, *smack*, I remember gasping.  I also remember the thrill, the depth of submission that I felt, the flood of wetness it produced.  I was in my place, I was His, and I was WONTON.  It was a claiming like I had never known before.  I LOVED it!  I loved it so much, I didn't care if it was inappropriate to everyone else in the universe.  I was going to deal with my embarrassment, my shame and embrace my desire!  What's more, He liked it.  He didn't just like it, he was wicked turned on!

When he slaps me, I am immediately pliable.  I am open.  Over-caffeinated-butterflies take up residence in my stomach.  Everything clinches inside and my pussy is wet, like immediately, seriously wet!  This all happens in an instant and the results are undeniable.   While it is a gross understatement to say that it excites me, it would also be an understatement to say that it excites him.

We have explored face slapping for a while and now he doesn't even have to fully slap my face to have the same effect.  He can simply caress my cheek and it evokes the same feelings.   Don't you just love Pavlov's theory in action...just a caress and I have the same physical and emotional response.  Even though I have the same response, I often will lean into his hand, silently inviting imploring him to ... slap me.

SAD

The sky on November 5, 2011, the day she died.

Warning:  NOTHING Sexy or Hot 

written here.  Just life – real life…

I am sad.  Profoundly sad.  Last year was noteworthy on the tragic side for me.  I lost.  I lost friends, I lost family, I lost familiarity, I lost.  You know how they have those tests for stress and they include; death, divorce, change in job, change in location... - well, I didn't get divorced.  

I have had a good year since then, overall.  I have grieved and grown.  But today.  Today is hard.  Today is sad.   One year ago today, I lost the person I was closest to in this world, next to my husband.  I lost the most precious person who knew me since I was born.  I knew this day would be hard and, indeed, many tears have been shed and the hole in my heart and soul is still large. 

The sky the evening I put her in the ground.

I had asked my love, my husband, my Sir to be here on this day, as I knew it would be hard.  I asked many moons ago…and this is not something I really ever do.  He planned on being here and at the last minute – well a couple of weeks ago, he had to set up a business trip on this day (yesterday and tomorrow too).  I was despondent when he told me – feeling sad and betrayed and alone.  Now, I do realize, in the cold light of day, that it may be a little way too dramatic  to go there…but at the moment it was real.  

I asked him on Saturday to please spank me - really spank me, and make sure I was in as good of a place as I could be in before he left.  He promise to do just that.  Guess what…life happened.  I went up to our room and he did too.  We packed and he fell asleep.  I was … you guessed it … sad and frusterated and angry.  I cried, silent tears, not that it would have mattered, he was asleep.  I moved over to the side of the bed furthest away from him.  I tried to sleep, but couldn’t .  After a bit of time too long, I decided I wasn’t punishing him by sleeping far away and distancing myself.  I snuggled up and put myself in the position that is our ritual rule.  I slid off into dream land.  

*slap*

I awoke to a swift smack of his hand on my ass, then rubbing -  Ohh Ohhh.  He spanked me awake and then kissed me.  It was the middle of the night, just prior to him having to leave.  He got out the flogger and flogged.  He told me the last few would be hard – he had to make them count as he said.  They were HARD – they counted.  He kissed me and gave me directions…things to do.  I was to stay plugged for specific periods of time, to do specific things around the house...he was trying to help me stay focused and not fall apart.  He has been calling and being attentive.  I am grateful for his help.  I am grateful for his love.  I am grateful for what I have…

... but I am still at a loss.  I am still sad.  I am still broken hearted.  Today is hard and I am sad.  

He Flogs ...100 ... 200 ...

Yep, this is one of my beautiful
Floggers made by Conina

We were in the bedroom getting ready for bed;  Bathroom, getting towels for morning showers, morning clothes, picking up dirty laundry, talking about this and that.  I quietly close the door while he was in the bathroom, hoping he doesn't hear it lock.  He was getting out floss and I lay, naked, over the side of the bed.  This is my sign that I need, not want, NEED a spanking.  He walks in to change the television channel, floss in hand and sees me.

"Get the flogger for me, then lay back down and don't move," he commands without missing a beat.  Oh how I love that he doesn't miss a beat.  He changes the channel and then proceeds to floss his teeth.

I get the flogger, shown on the right, the one with the knots in it so that it packs a bit more of a punch (all puns intended).  I need that tonight.  I need more intensity.  I lay the flogger next to me as I lay back across the bed, on the balls of my feet, back flat with my hands stretched across the bed.  I wait and breathe.  He flosses his teeth and I hear him getting his toothbrush.  He walks in, I can't see him, but can hear him brushing his teeth behind me.

"AAaahhhh!"  I say in surprise - I hadn't heard him pick up the flogger.  It doesn't hurt, but simply surprises me.

He brushes his teeth and flogs.  It is somehow a bit more exciting because he seems to be flogging his slut as an afterthought...like it simply goes along with something as pedestrian as brushing his teeth.  Just... getting ready for bed.

He flogs me! Changing the location of the strike only slightly.  He flogs!  He is aiming for my ass...not my thighs or back...just my ass. He flogs!   Now as I have a not-unsubstancial ass, there is a bit of space for variation - but not very much.  He flogs!  He changes the intensity of the strike.  He flogs!   He changes where on the falls it hits - weather it is mostly knots or knots pulling across the silky tails.  He flogs!

...He flogs!
...He flogs!

Somewhere around 200 and I am slipping.  My breathing, that had been more like panting, more like moaning, more ... just more ... suddenly becomes quiet.  My body which had been moving on the bed, exploring the sensations, asking for more, meeting the flogger in invitation for another strike, stills.  I slip.  I quiet.  I absorb, I am lost - no I am FOUND!  I am content, feeling each strike but only externally.  My mind is quiet, I am calm, I feel safe, surrounded by ... surrounded by ... space.

He stops at 300.  I can feel my ass heating the entire room.  There may have been a thermal spike in the town we live in, I don't know.  He walks around the bed, moves my hands and lays down.   He pulls his hand to his cock.  I touch, I stroke, I rub.  He gives me time to find myself.

"May I climb onto the bed, please Sir?"  I ask.

"Yes." he says.  "You needed that didn't you?"

"Oh, Yes, Sir!  Thank you, Sir." And my mouth devours him.  "Take your hand, fiona.  Hold me."  he commands.  I know him to mean that I am to hold and play with his balls while I suck.  Oh, the veins.  I love feeling his throbbing veins on his cock.  Feeling the blood pumping through him.  I love the strength of his cock and the feel of him pushing down my throat.  I love how slick and smooth it is after he has shoved down my throat several times.  Oh, do I love my Sir's manhood.

"When is the last time you swallowed for me, fiona?" He asks, knowing it's been a couple of weeks.  "boo bwong!" is my reply with my mouth around him.  "Come here, I want you to taste yourself, when you taste me."  He says as he grabs me and pulls me up.  I lower down onto him and he fucks for only a few minutes then pushing me back down.  I lick his balls, suck on them for a minute, then replace my mouth with my hand as I move to take his cock back into my mouth.  I suck, he pumps.  His hand grabs and pulls my hair, controlling my head, defining the pace, fucking my mouth.  I can taste... me, I can taste my wetness on him.  He cums and I suck, I lick, I savor. I hold it all.  I revel in every moment.

After he is all spent, I open my mouth to show him his gift.  "Oh, fiona.  You ARE a good girl.  Now swallow!"

mmmmmmmmm

THE dildo

My Sir doesn't read my blog on his own, yet (I hope he will at some point).  If I pull it up and put it in front of him, then he reads it.  He hasn't been unhappy about anything he's seen yet (I hope he never is).  I just hate to feel like I am bothering him with my blog if he doesn't think of it or ask for it on his own.

So after I published the last one, I told him what the title was (Puppet Orgasmed To Tears).  "Hmh," he said.  "I thought you would have blogged about last night with the dildo."

"Oh - ya."  SHIT - how did I forget about that?

      okay - so in my defense, I didn't forget...I simply hadn't taken any notes and so...

...so, I don't remember everything.   What I know is...

• I was spanked with his hand.  I was over his lap on our bed.  It was ... invigorating.
• I gave him a blow job.  It was .... (I have no idea).
• I find myself laying next to him, head by his knees and feet by his head
• He says, "Get THE dildo."
• I clearly remember thinking, "SHIT, FUCK!  No not that..Yes I want that... No" 
• Side note...THE dildo is unique among our dildos because it is HUGE.
• I bring it back and he positions me beside him so my head is by his knees, feed by his head.
• He butterflies my legs and inserts THE dildo and I felt so embarrassed.
• He FUCKS me silly with THE dildo and I have NO idea how many orgasms I had....but it was over six.
• As he's starting his last onslaught, he says, "Do you imagine some other guy fucking you when I do this, fiona?"  WHAT???  OMG NO!!!

So...odd post (this is what happens with no little notes).  But I also know that I felt sore and swollen and particularly sensitive all the next day.  I am a lucky girl!