Wednesday, February 13, 2013

The Ritual I Missed

Sir Q and I have only a few "rituals."  One of them started very innocuously, not a request by him or something premeditated by me.  But all of a sudden, I'm doing this minor service every morning.  I don't notice it as being a "ritual" until I realize that if I don't do it and I really miss it.



Putting on 

His shoes
and socks 
in the morning.




Sir gets up and goes to work it is before I have a need to get up.  About six-eight months ago, I started getting up to put his socks and shoes on.  It's gotten to the place that when he opens his sock drawer, I wake up.  It's amazing.  The sound of the wood, sliding open, him removing his socks from the drawer...my response is Pavlovian.  I can be in a dead sleep and that act - not the alarm, not him getting out of bed, not the shower, not getting dressed...but opening his drawer, and I'm awake.  I pull back the covers, immediately, roll off of his side of the bed, sit cross-legged on the floor and take his socks.  I take one of his feet and set it on my knee.  I take the socks apart and put one sock on - touching his foot, rubbing it as I pull it up, caressing his calf as I smooth the top, I pull down his pant leg, then put on his shoe (most frequently black dress shoes), tie them, then set his foot back on the floor.  I then redo the same process with the other foot.  When I'm done, I stand up, get back in bed and he kisses me and tells me to have a good day.

It's not much, but it means a lot to me.  I never knew how much it meant until I was sick this week and he didn't wake me up and I didn't wake up.  I had the stomach flu and was really OUT of it.  So, he was doing me a kindness in letting me sleep.  I felt so sad about not doing this little thing.  I felt ... dissatisfied ... like something was missing (other than my food).  I really missed this small act.  Today I got up and put on his socks and shoes and it was so meaningful to me.  And as I type this, that seems so silly to say.  Putting on someones shoes - meaningful?  But really it was to ME.  All's is right in my world.


18 comments:

  1. Hi Fiona,

    So glad you are you feeling better. This sounds like a wonderful ritual to me. Sometimes it seems the ones we initiate ourselves do become the most meaningful. So glad you are back on track.

    Lovely post

    db

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    Replies
    1. Thanks db, I'm glad to be feeling better.

      hugs,
      fiona

      Delete
  2. Isn't funny how we can place so much meaning on something that seems so trivial? I guess it really is only trivial if it doesn't mean anything. We have a small ritual in the morning that I miss so much if I don't get to do it, too. Good to hear you are feeling well enough to do what makes you both feel good :)

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    Replies
    1. Very good point faerie. I like the idea that it's only trivial if it means nothing. What is your morning ritual?

      hugs,
      fiona

      Delete
  3. Terrific ritual fiona. Thank you for sharing.

    Hug,
    joey

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  4. OOh i enjoy this, but the opposite,(mornings not a good time for me so for his health and sanity he leaves me be mostly lol) i like removing his shoes when he gets home and his socks when we retire for the night, i enjoy foot worship.

    x

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    Replies
    1. LOL, I love that he leaves you alone for his health and sanity (and yours). It is lovely to sit at his feet, isn't it?!

      hugs,
      fiona

      Delete
  5. finding pleasure in the mundane not only helps but strengthens the relationships. I'm sure he appreciates it and missed it as much as you did.

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    Replies
    1. I whole heartedly agree. Thanks cammie.

      hugs,
      fiona

      Delete
  6. Fiona,

    I just loved this post. I think this is a great ritual:) Thank you so much for sharing this and also so glad that you are feeling better!

    Belle:)

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Belle. I am feeling better and am soooo thankful!

      hugs,
      fiona

      Delete
  7. I think it's a very adoring ritual.

    Love,
    Hannah

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    Replies
    1. Oh, Lord, do I love this man! Thanks Hannah,

      hugs,
      fiona

      Delete
  8. sounds like a wonderful ritual...it is something that is special to you... :-) Take care, Terpsichore

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Terpsichore. I am grateful for the ritual.

      hugs,
      fiona

      Delete

Thank you very much for sharing your comments. This blogland world has become so much more meaningful because of the conversations that y'all have with me through comments...REALLY!

I appreciate them all and will endeavor to answer EVERY comment if at all possible!

THANK YOU
-fiona