Monday, May 5, 2014

I Wonder...

I wonder…

How is this relationship
affecting my children?

What will my children think
of the relationship between
their mom and their dad?

Will they remember us
as being loving?
as being in love?
as being affectionate?
as being kind?

Or…

Will they remember us
with me kneeling at his feet (hugging him)?
with his hands in my hair (pulling it)?
our door being locked with any frequency?
fighting with each other (unique, because it almost never happens)?
or just being contented with each other?
hearing the smack of a spank (or smack)?
hearing the moans of extraordinarily satisfying sex?
with my "yes, Sir's" or "no, Sir's"?

Will they think of us as
weird?
strange?
loving?
violent?
controlling?
normal?

Will our choice of TTWD effect my children?

26 comments:

  1. I think they will remember you as their parents, who helped them to grow into young adults, with wonderful family memories.....
    hugs abby

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    Replies
    1. I hope so…I really do. We certainly work on the memories!

      hugs,
      fiona

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  2. I have been wondering that ever since we started our M/s journey. I don't know. But what I do know is that I don't have any choice in being this way anymore. It's not something we can turn back from. Also, I think that a loving home is a loving home, whatever the structures in place, and that is good for kids.

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    Replies
    1. I so agree…I don't think it's as much a choice as it is who we are. I do hope to provide a lot of love and to raise some good kids…but I do wonder.

      hugs,
      fiona

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  3. I have often wondered the same thing. Kids definitely take their cues from parents about what they do and don't want in their own relationships. I hope that regardless of how my kids feel about the dynamic between us, they see a couple who rarely fights, has fun and above all else have an abundance of unconditional love for each other and for them. If they take that away, well then I feel like I've done my job.

    As others have said ^^ this is the way we are now and couldn't change it if we tried. If my girls have heard and moans or smacks of great sex happening, well I hope that as they grow up they will realize that having a healthy sex life is an important part of any marriage.

    There is so much more I could say about this subject but I'll leave it there. ;-)
    xo

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    Replies
    1. I do hope that they learn that it is a healthy part of a good marriage…but I hope that it isn't scaring. We'll see I guess…time will tell. We certainly adore each other.

      hugs,
      fiona

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  4. Time will tell. At least they will have a head start on knowing a way to be in a loving marriage and tips on how to keep things exciting.

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  5. This is a common wonder of mine...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know…where's that damn crystal ball??

      hugs,
      fiona

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  6. They will see a loving couple who respect each other and have a few eccentricities :) As for noises etc, think of other things that some kids hear or see - black eyes, violent arguments, mum locked in the bathroom in fear. As SG says, only time will tell, but I don't think you have anything to worry about :)
    P routinely swats my butt in front of the kids - I don't think it registers one bit as unhealthy because we're both smiling.
    hugs
    Del

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    Replies
    1. There are many worse things…that's for sure. I just wonder…what they will take away with them.

      hugs,
      fiona

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  7. It will have an effect on your children. They will see their parents being incredibly close and loving and totally into each other, and they will seek that out in their own relationships and will not settle. It will make their lives infinitely richer and more satisfying than if you both settled for less than the best.

    If they hear you having sex - oh well. Everyone's parents had sex. That may be something they'd rather not think about - and in that case they'd best avoid any walls where they might hear you, eh? :)

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I know that they see us as loving each other and hugging each other…but I never know what else they think or interpret…time will tell.

      hugs,
      fiona

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  8. Conina B said it all. I personally think that D/s is one of the healthiest and most natural dynamics out there, but I might be biased :-)

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  9. Replies
    1. Just makes you think. Hmmmmm.

      hugs,
      fiona

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  10. They will know that it's the norm that parents love each other and are openly affectionate with each other and just tender toward one another. There are so many relationships where the couple barely touches (after so many years together) and I know how I grew up and I didn't want that. I want love - unconditional - to be the norm. It's what they should expect in their own relationships and I hope they see that. There's nothing wrong with this - it's an expression of love and they won't be able to help but see it as that.

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    Replies
    1. I hope so. I really do.

      Hugs,
      fiona

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  11. fiona,

    I think your children see you as two loving parents. I have always believed that it helps make children feel secure and loved when they see the affection their parents have for each other.

    Your play helps you stay connected with each other. I am sure that your children sense this.

    Hug,
    joey

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    Replies
    1. Thanks joey. We do love each other and lord knows we adore them as well…but they're kids, so you never know what they see or hear or how they interpret things.

      hugs,
      fiona

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  12. Hi Fiona! I nominated you for a Liebster award. I love this blog!

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    1. Wow, ancilla! Thank you. You are a doll!

      I LOVE YOUR BLOG AS WELL!!

      hugs,
      fiona

      Delete
  13. If your a loving couple, wich I'm sure you are, and they see it then thats what important.
    This is what will inspire them to look for in their partners and not settle for less.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks sub kitty. We certainly are very loving and caring and I hope good parents as well.

      hugs,
      fiona

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Thank you very much for sharing your comments. This blogland world has become so much more meaningful because of the conversations that y'all have with me through comments...REALLY!

I appreciate them all and will endeavor to answer EVERY comment if at all possible!

THANK YOU
-fiona