Puppet Orgasmed to Tears

His lips are on mine, soft and loving. You know how some kisses are just...luscious.  His tongue dancing with mine, heating, building urgency.   His hands on my head, our bodies lying flush against each other.  I can feel him hardening against me.  There is an energy around us and an intimacy that is palpable.

He had been so loving and so gentle.  Our kiss breaks and I look into his eyes.  He gazes at me and I whisper,  “Make love to me.” 

He holds my gaze.  His eyes seem to darken, I don’t know how he does it without a word, but he Doms-up.  He is not my lover, he is my Sir, I am his sub, I am His.  I know my place.

One of his hand that had been gently holding my head during the kiss, tightens and my hair pulls taught. The other hand moves and gently caresses my cheek.  Oh, I can feel my insides clench, by stomach drop, my pussy moisten.  I lean into his hand and close my eyes. 

*slap* 

Not hard, just claiming.  “Mmmhhh,” I moan.

And the mood  is set. 

He rolls onto his back and I move to curl around his body.   I open my mouth and hungrily begin to give his hardness the attention it deserves.  I kiss, lick, slurp, suck.  He reaches his hand down and starts to play with my erect nipples.  He pinches, I suck…he rolls, I suck (mmmmm) …he squeezes, I suck (ohhhhh) …he flicks, I suck…

The fire is burning, the energy builds.

He moves his hand down and pulls me off of my side, onto my knees, my head still buried on his head.  He spanks and a rhythm builds.  He’s striking me as he lifts his hips and pumps his cock and pushes down my throat.  I moan.  It’s mind-numbing – all of the senses that are being stimulated.  My backside is stinging, my insides turning, my mouth full, gag - my breath taken away - remember to breath.

And just like before, he suddenly shifts, putting his palm on my sex.  He grasps – he squeezes, I freeze -  stop breathing.   Once again, he claims me.  He releases me and quickly puts his thumb inside.  I am dripping, there is an obvious squishing noise as he moves his thumb in and out and I'm building to a fever pitch.  I’m sucking – harder – I’m moving up and down his penis like it is the piston on a freight train.  He’s moving, curling his thumb and hitting the most amazing love button inside.  And I feel myself, I feel the energy surging, I feel the build…and I impale myself on his cock while I start to pulse around him.  My orgasm a title wave, washing over me.

I figure this portion of our show is over, I have cum.  He keeps his thumb in me.  It's time for him, time for him to cum, but I need a minute.  I breath – no more accurately, I pant.  Then comes his command.

“Squeeze.”

nothing

That’s right, I heard him but I don’t think I processed anything. 

“Squeeze it, Fiona!” he commands again.

He knows, I cum much faster and it is much more intense when I squeeze against that which impales me.  When it is his finger, there is no half-assing it, he can tell.  I’ve got to be all in.  I refocus on him.  I lift my head up and begin to pump again on him.  I redouble my suction, the seal my lips make around his girth.  I pump feverishly and … squeeze.  OHHH.  OOHH.  His thumb moves, he pushes it in and hits my pelvis - forcefully.  At the same time he hits, he curls his thumb under my pubic bone.  Ahhhh – I suck – I moan – I squeeze – i, i.

I cum.  I am impaled on his thumb and I cum like the puppet I am.  He pauses and I pant and he starts again.  Oh no – Oh no – Oh no.

i cum

I am rung out, I am spent.  I can’t breath, I can’t catch my breath, my head is literally swimming.

“SQUEEZE IT FIONA!”

Oh I can’t.  I can’t squeeze again, I can’t cum again, I can’t. 

I squeeze and he starts again.  My mouth is wide open, holding his dripping cock.  I can taste his salty precum as it slides down my tongue from the back of my throat.  I start to build and I start to grunt and groan and moan.

AHHH SO INTENSE – SO MUCH – SO MUCH - AHHH 

I am simply his puppet.  His thumb in me moving me as he chooses.

the world stops … nothing

I have no idea of time …my mind is blown.

He grabs my hair, pulls and starts to move my body.  He positions me over him – on top of him. I’m sure he’s talking, he may have been all along.  I have no idea, I have no hearing.  Everything is silent in my head. I lower onto him because I am exhausted and my legs are jelly.  I am close to cuming just upon entry.  After the priming,  I am set to blow.  I rise up – my hands fly to my face, tears streaming down, my mouth opens and I …

“AAAAHHHHHHHHH,”  I SCREAM and I CUM!!!!!!!

FUCK!

I’ve been orgasmed to tears, his good little puppet.

*Smack* *Slap*

Warning:  Long, albeit hot, Post Ahead.

-------

I am sitting on the bed, just out of the shower.  My hair is wrapped in a towel, as is my clean, smooth warm, sensitized body.  I am sitting on the side of the bed, towards the top.  Sir walks purposefully up to me.  I nervously look up at him.  Nervous, you ask - why nervous?  Well, I had not made the best of choices at the end of the night where he was concerned.  I was not necessarily respectful, thoughtful, or understanding of a Sir who has worked excessive hours lately to provide for his family and is fried.

He looked at me.  He leaned down, for a kiss, I thought.  His face about two inches from mine, eyes looking through his black rimmed glasses - boring into me.  I was transfixed.  I didn't notice that his hands weren't visible.  His left hand quickly grabbed my left calf and he yanked.  YANKED and in a split second, I was on my back, towel fallen open beside me, left leg crossed to my right ear and pinned against the iron headboard. Sir's hand effortlessly moved to my ankle and encompassed the cold, hard, bed post in his grip.  

As my mind is racing to catch up with what is happening, he quickly swats my ass.  It's not a gentle swat.  What the Fuck is he doing - OW that HURTS.  He's quick.  He's grouping them.  He's hitting just the one side of my ass five times at a stint - each one a steady 8 on the Richter scale.  At one of his pauses, I catch my breath. 

"What are you doing?" I ask

"What do you mean?" he says so innocently.

"That hurts like hell, what are you doing differently?"

And with a wicked glint in his eyes, he smiles. He fucking smiles!  Argh!

 "I don't know."  

*SMACK* 

*SMACK*

*SMACK*  

*SMACK*  

*SMACK*

I throw my hands above my head.  I grab the sheets and breath.  He spanks me in the exact same spot and I have never felt it sting like it is now.  I know it's just his hand, but it's stingier than that blasted brush.  I feel like the sting goes six inches deep.  My nerves are on fire.  Even writing this today, I can FEEL exactly where he hit me!

He stops, rubs my bright red cheek.  It must be on fire.  He looks at the color.  I feel like he is overlooking his property the way he touches and observes with such coolness.  He proceeds to let go of my ankle and immediately pins my wrist against the bed.  Oh - what is he doing??  He reaches his other hand and rubs from my cheek (on my face), to my throat - giving it a quick squeeze, to my nipple - giving a good firm tug and then repeating on the other nipple.  It's as if he is just adjusting my nipples so they are in the position he wants them - perky and tall.  He leaves my other nipple and drags his finger to my...what?  He's under my arm ... 

- - AHHHH- Ha Ha Ha - - 

He's tickling me!  Now tickling has never been much a part of our play, but he's making me hysterical.

- - Ahhhhh - hahahahaha - -

I am truly out of my mind.  Laughing, gasping...

- - h h h h h h - -

My breathing is so erratic ...

I , I , i , i start to cough - I start to choke.  

Wow, well that wasn't sexy!

He lets me up and climbs on the bed.  I roll over and he pulls me into his side - with me on my back.  His arm is under my head.  I laugh and apologize for ruining the mood.  He chuckles and begins to let his hand traverse my body.  This time, he starts with my nipples - pinching, pulling, ahhh - twisting.  He moves to my throat and holds it firmly for a minute.  I gasp.  He squeezes and then puts his hand on my cheek.  

He rubs my cheek.  His hand, splayed full across the side of my face.  I lean into him.  He OWNES me.  

"Ask me."  he says.

"Ask me for it fiona!" he commands.

"please," I squeak out, my voice cracking with nervousness.

"Please, what?" he retorts.

"p," I exhale.  "please."  

he waits ...

              ... and I SCREAM internally - WHY DO YOU MAKE ME ASK?!?!

Taking a deep breath, I whisper, "please slap me."

    *slap*

                    I melt, I physically melt into the bed.  I mentally melt into him.  

"Ask me, fiona." he commands.

"please slap me."

    *slap*

"Please"

   

    *slap*     "PLEASE"  *slap*

I melted, continued heating and have ignited!  I am ravenous.  I am awash with need, with want, with desire, with submission, with NEED.  I am now moaning, twisting and turning on the bed - close to orgasm.

"Have you had enough?" he asks.  "Unh," I moan in reply.

"ASK" he commands.

"plea.."  *slap*

"Have you had enough?"

“no…” I whisper.  It’s always a miracle when I realize I actually was able to eek out the response I was shouting in my head.

“Then ask for it, Fiona”

“Ple –“    *slap*

He grabs my head off of his arm and pushes me to his crotch.  He is hard.  Oh my - He is HARD.  My stomach does a summersault.  I am always astonished when he is turned on by dominating me.  So often, let my mind eat away at my confidence in our D/s (for no good reason, mind you.)  I feel like he only dominates me because I want to submit and then there he is.  He has spanked me, prodded and pinched me, slapped me, AND He IS rock hard and using me as HE sees fit!  Oh My God I am so euphoric!

My mouth is pushed onto his cock.  It is - UNH - MMMMMMM.  I suck like my life depended on it.  I am truly hungry for HIM.  I suck, lick, kiss, lap at his cock.  I move my head franticly up and down the length of him.  

He grabs my arms and pulls me up – on top of him. "Were you as excited as I was, fiona?"  he says - almost detached.   He doesn’t slowly push his cock into my folds to then glide into me – he simply pushes straight in. 

“Come here” he commands as he grabs the back of my head and positions my ear next to his mouth.

“Oh, Fiona, you were as excited as I was. How do I know?” his voice soaring on the current of his warm, erotic breath.

Oh my!!

I’m moving on top of him at wild pace. I am almost frantic with need – with desire. 

“Tell me how I know, Fiona!” he growls

He pushes up into me – grinding his pelvis into mine.   I still.  We’re connected, we are one...and He stills.  We both cum.  I feel him shooting deep inside.   We are still!

oh my god – we are NEVER still, I am NEVER quiet. 

We cum – I clench around his cock firing into my excited, wet, needy pussy.

We are still and we are one.

Yes or No

So on my daily reading ...

• Fondlers Anonymous
• Smiling Belle's Journey
• faerie learns to fly

     I saw this going about and thought I would take a go.

My first meme - yep, I'm a meme virgin.  Here goes - wish me luck =)

-----------------------------------------

Here are the rules: You must answer yes or no. You may not explain unless someone asks.

  

Made money illegally? No
Taken a picture naked? Yes
Had a one night stand? No
Been in a fist fight? Yes
Slept with your best friend? Yes
Had sex in a public place? Yes
Ditched work to have sex? Yes
Slept with a member of the same sex? No
Seen someone die? Yes

Ran from the police? Yes
Woke up somewhere and not remember how you got there? Yes
Worn your partners unmentionables? Yes
Fallen asleep at work? Yes
Used toys in the bedroom? Yes
Ran a red light? Yes
Been fired? No
Been in a car accident? Yes
Pole danced or done a striptease? Yes
Loved someone you shouldn't? No
Sang karaoke? Yes
Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? Yes
Laughed so hard you peed your pants? Yes
Caught someone having sex? Yes
Kissed a perfect stranger? Yes
Shaved your partner? Yes
Given your private parts a nickname? No
Ever gone in public without underwear? Yes
Had sex on a roof top? No
Played chicken? Yes
Mooned/flashed someone? Yes
Do you sleep naked? Yes/No
Blacked out from drinking? Yes
Felt like killing someone? Yes
Had sex more than 5 times in one day? Yes
Been with someone because they were in a band? No
Taken 10 shots of liquor in a day? Yes
Shot a gun? No
Gone outside naked? Yes

Oh - my mime cherry - Gone.  Just like that.  Painless.  I don't know - worth it??  Fun nonetheless =)

Thank You, Bonnie!

Thank You, Danke, Mahalo, Gracias, Xie Xie, Obrigada, Spacibo, Arigato

Thank you Bonnie for your efforts to support and nurture our Spanko world!  Thank you also for including my post on your New listing.  I do so greatly appreciate it.

You are a Hero among bloggers!!

mlb

So I have had several questions about what mlb stands for - as in Sir Q's mlb.  That's what my e-mail says.   Kitty asked me when she linked to my blog on her Follow Friday Post.  I tried to distract and didn't answer.  Hermione asked in a comment on my post about Musical Spankings.  She assumed that it was not Major League Baseball.  Once again, I deflected - though with a completely truthful statement.  In all of the times he's called me that, I've never once thought that it also stood for Major League Baseball (oops.)  Fondles was having none of my diversionary techniques.  She guessed My Little Bottom, My Lovely Bum, and Merry Lively Bitch.  I loved these possibilities.  I asked if I could vote on my favorite of those.

So, I have not given anyone a straight answer.

I told Sir last night that someone had asked what it stood for (he obviously knows as he is the one person who says it.)  "So, did you tell them?"

... Uh, no.

So I thought about it.  I told him that I didn't want to because it was between him and me.

"Hahahahah!"  Could you hear him from where you are?

Then I started to say that it was private, BUT I have written about some SERIOUSLY private material - is this - Really?  So...

mlb stands for.....  schrstchscrscrat - i'm heading into a tunnel...my recep - scxraasdcscssrrr - is really ba -scfrascrsa - d I'll tell you it stands for ..... m....CLICK

Well in my head, this is one of my limits.   It's not to say that I won't say what it means later...just for right now, it's his name for me.  It's not terrible, it's not tied to some hilarious story and he isn't a baseball nut.  I may write about some VERY PRIVATE material, but for now, the lines of that limit hasn't been redrawn.  You're welcome to give ideas or alternate suggestions, though.

Thank You, Sir!

I am not an overly dramatic person and I do NOT cry easily or often.  Upon receiving some upsetting news, I free
                fell
                   into
                        a
                      well.
Maybe I was just at an especially sensitive emotional place prior to getting the news.  I sent Sir a text and said I was Angry, Frustrated, Sad and Scared.  I explained why and asked for help.  So, that's also another thing I don't do often...ask for help.  He called before leaving work and I cried.  He talked to me all of the way home and I cried.  He explained that he was going to help me.  That he would watch over me and make sure I was ok.

He walked through the door and set down his bag.  With my head down and tears streaming down my cheek, I walked over to him.  He put his arms around me and hugged me, tightly.  I felt enveloped.  He tangled one hand in my hair and I knew he was going to exert his power over me and expect me to respond.  I wasn't feeling submissive.  I was sad.  He held onto me - simply held tight.  One arm tight around my back and the other fisting in my hair.  I cried on his shoulder and he made sure that I felt secure.  

After I stopped crying he pulled my hair down so my face tilted up.  He gently kissed my mouth.  He kissed my tears.  He kissed my eyes and cheeks.  He kissed.  His lips felt like pillows - really.  It was amazing.  Now Sir does have fabulously full lips which I do adore, but he was kissing so gently.  So thoroughly.

His tongue began to explore my mouth.  My sadness was seeping out of me.  It was like he was sucking the sadness and despair from my soul.  With the hand that was fisting in my hair tightening, he moved his other hand from my back and took a firm hold of my jaw.  He pulled back and looked at me.  He looked serious, he looked intent, he looked like my Dom.  He looked more Dom-like than I can recall him looking.  

"i need to make dinner," I say quietly looking down.

"No." He says firmly.

"i need to make your dinner," I repeat and quickly heard the same response.  He kissed me again, this time eliciting moans.  He pulled my head back by my hair and put his hand on my throat. Oh, do I love it when his hand is on my throat.  He squeezes gently and pulls my hair tighter - just to the point of pain.  "We don't have much time, but you need a spanking, don't you?" he says.  My brain immediately screams "NO - I won't ask for this!" but my mouth whispers "yes, Sir."  I know in my heart, that I need his help.  I need him.  I need him to spank me.  Oh - how can I admit that to myself?

Right there in the kitchen, he spanks me six times, rapidly and firmly.  I'm starting to feel heady...starting to feel fuzzy ... starting to feel better.  He takes me into laundry room and closes the door.  I notice something on the floor.  Bending over to pick it up so that I can move further into the room, he spanks me once, then removes the item from my hand and drops it on the floor again.  I know that his intent was for me to bend back over.  Well...being the good submissive that I am, I bent right back over.  He proceeded to spank me.

"Say it, ask me fiona," he says.
"please," i whisper.

"ASK me fiona," he says.
"Please, Sir.  Please spank me," I say a little louder.

"Good Girl," he praised me.  He spanks me rapidly in the SAME spot.  Oh, I'm feeling vibrations going through me...it acts like an emotional reboot.

He helps me stand up and pushes me back against the sink. The stability of the sink is welcome, as my legs feel like a Jenga tower with too many blocks pulled out. He reaches behind me, undoes my bra, takes it off, and begins to pinch my nipples.  He isn't being gentle.  He is making sure I know he is in control.  My nipples are burning - oh they feel so good.

He takes one of his hands and pushes my hand against his enormous cock.  "Please, Sir, Please.  Please let me suck.  Please, please, Please Sir."  I am all but begging.  He puts his hands, solidly on my shoulder and pushes me down.

I unzip his pants and it's there!  Oh God - i need...I need...I...!  I kiss his head and it is so soft - silky smooth.  He has a bead of cum on the tip.  I have a sudden surge of insane excitement, need.  I'm like a kid in a candy store.  I suck .. no .. I suckle at his head.  It tastes like the best ice cream, the richest dark chocolate, a perfect carmel.  I suck very hard and take him further into my mouth fully.  He puts his hand, calmly and firmly into my hair and pulls my head onto the full length his cock.  He pushes down my throat.  Unh!  I'm groaning, I'm moaning, oh I am so close to cuming.  He's holding my head.  I am controlled.

I open my mouth, but don't completely remove his cock for fear he take it away.  I look up and see him looking down at me.  My Sir, my Dom is looking at me with knowing eyes, with love, with compassion.  I feel better.  I feel home.  My mind screams out, 'Oh, Thank You Sir!' but instead i whisper, "Please feed me, Sir."

The Musical Spanking

"Oh My God!  That is the coolest thing.  Did you hear that fiona?"

He had just flipped me onto my stomach and had spanked me with THAT brush.  Ya, the brush that I love-to-hate so much.  He hit me again and I buried my head in the pillow, absorbing the blow and breathing.  Again, again...

"uuu uuu uuuu uuuu?"  I think he said something.

panting...panting

Then he stops... and I regain my senses (stop hyperventilating).

"DID"  **SMACK**
"YOU"  **SMACK**
"HEAR" **SMACK**
"THAT" **SMACK**

...and then he's laughing.

...and then I'm laughing.

Our beautiful black iron bed frame, the one that I adore, RINGS everytime he hits me.

The bed, my ass, the brush and Sir are a perfect TIBETAN SINGING BOWLl!!

A Blog For A Flog

I started this blog with the blessing of Sir.  I showed him the blog prior to any content being written.  I asked if he wanted to view any posts before I published them, to which he said, "No." So I have published a few posts - and I had told him that I had done them.  He had said that he wanted to read them, but then life happened.  He promised to read it yesterday when we came home.  We came home from running errands and he immediately started watching a game on TV.  I did not want to nag him, but I was very frustrated.  I huffed, I sulked, I was irritated and disappointed.  When I realized that I was being petulant, I walked over to him, knelt before him, placed my head on his lap and said I was sorry.  I immediately felt my submission and knew that was where I was supposed to be.  He stroked my head and held it to him.  When I began to get up, he held me in place and my stomach dropped.  He wasn't ignoring me, he was doing what HE wanted to do, when HE wanted to do it.  When the game ended, he turned off the TV and simply said, "Bed, now" and pointed.

I stood up and as I started walking, he told me to get the computer and the flogger.

As I came into our room, I set the computer in the middle of the bed and went to get the flogger.  I came in, he held out his hand, took the flogger and he told me to 'assume the position.'  Now I know when he has a spanking implement, that 'position' he refers to is me, naked, bent over the side of the bed.  He lay in the middle of the bed with me over the side behind him.  He was ignoring me - again!  Argh.

He was quietly looking at the computer and I couldn't see him, see his face, tell what he was thinking.  I was sooo nervous, worried, embarrassed, uncertain, anxious.  Oh why did I think I could start a blog.  Why did I think this was a good idea.  What was I thinking?  I close my eyes and focus on my breathing in an effort to calm my nerves.

He shuts the computer screen, gets off the bed and walks around.  He tells me to give him my hand.  Is he going to hit my hand?  Is he unhappy?  Did he find it displeasing?

ZZZZZ   He unzips his pants?

He places his very hard cock in my hand and says, "I like what you wrote."

He liked it?  OH - he like it!

He steps away from my hand and then OUWW!  I forgot he had the flogger.  He doesn't warm up, he simply flogs - VERY HARD over my ass. It is very thuddy.  My breathing is picking up, moaning more while he's getting harder with each swing.  It's almost like he is flogging something two feet on the other side of my ass.  WOW breathe it's breathe intense breathe.  I'm breathing harder, my head is beginning to get fuzzy.

"Spread your legs. NOW," he says and begins to flog my thighs and OH - my pussy.  Wow - the flogger is wrapping around.  OH OH - it's hitting, Aaahhh - it hit my clit.  My breathing is so fast - all I hear is keening and panting - from me!

"Roll over and get up on my bed," he says - still flogging my legs.  Keeping my eyes closed, I roll over onto my back and scoot, very ungracefully, to the middle of the bed.  Without missing a beat he continues to flog me.  He's flogging my stomach, my breasts.  The falls land on my nipples and I can feel them hardening even further.  Ahhh - how I love to have my breasts flogged.

He is still clothed, and I am naked.  My skin is so sensitized.  He mounts me and his clothes feel so abrasive.  He fucks - hard, slamming into me.  Oh his cock is so hard and - AAHH.  With one hand he cups my breast and then pulls at my nipple.  He rolls and twists as he pumping into me.  Just as he pinches very hard, I open my eyes WIDE with a Holy Hell sort of look.  He grabs the back of my neck and spins me so he is under me and pulls my ear to his mouth.  With his free hand he pushes me down onto him and he pumps up to make an sound impact.

"Tell me," he says.  I'm breathing so hard and feeling overwhelmed with sensation.

"TELL ME!"  he says.  Oh he's talking to me!

He's holding my head in place and spanking my ass with his free hand.  What on EARTH is he talking about?  He does this sometimes and I have NO idea how to form a single coherent thought, let alone what I should be thinking about telling him.

"Tell me what you are!"  -  spank
"TELL ME" - Spank SPANK

breathe, fiona.  breathe.  Shit, no,  I mean speak fiona.  Speak!

I whisper, "yours" on an exhale.

"What are you??"

"Yours," I say in a whisper, but with a little more intent.

"Good Girl," he says then continues with a growl,  "you are MINE!"

With that, I arch my back and scream, throwing my head, he releases my hair and I cum.  I can feel my pussy clenching around his cock.  He must be able to feel it pulsing too, because he cums - loudly.  There is very little that is more amazing than hearing Sir cum LOUDLY.

I feel his cock pulsing in answer to my pussy.

He grabs my back and holds me to him.

"I love you," I say to him.  "I love you too - and fiona, you are MINE!" he repeats.   In response to his statement, I roll off, bend over and clean his beautiful, hard cock with my mouth - affirming that indeed,
I AM HIS!

oh - and he LIKED my blog (YEA!!)

Fantasy based on Reality

Fantasies...

Oh the fantasies that I have.  Some of them will NEVER happen, but are hot as hell in my mind.  Many of them are based off of things that have happened, sometimes modified, sometimes intensified, sometimes made more risqué.  Sometimes it's just a replaying of actual events in my mind.

I go into the office most Friday's with my Sir.  Most people are not in on Fridays so it's typically quiet.  He works and I...work.  So it's Friday and I am going into the office.  We walk down the hall, past his secretary's empty desk and into his office.  I brought the computer with me to do some work, so I sit at the conference table at one side of his office.  He sits behind his desk and gets to work.  Sir is very focused.  He has much to do and uses his time wisely.  Usually he only works till noon so we can then go enjoy lunch together.  I'm wearing heals, a skirt, a white shirt with a scarf around my neck.  I am not really dressed up but more ... put together.

Around 10:30, I notice that he has stopped typing and is looking at me.  I stop typing, smile coyly and say, "hi."  His eyes darken and his look hardens just a bit.  He gets up, never taking his eyes off of me, he walks over to his door and shuts it.  He motions for me to come to him.  I silently stand up, drop my eyes and walk over.  The intensity of his stare has overpowered me - without a finger being lifted, I'm his.  When I get to him, he tightens the scarf - which had been loosely wrapped around my neck - not cutting off my airflow, but making it tight.  Oh - I'm wet.  He pulls me close to him and I think he is going to hug me, but it was simply to unfasten my bra.  Oh no, if someone opened his door, I couldn't fix that quickly enough to have it not be noticeable!  He puts his hands under my shirt and begins to play with my nipples.  He's stretching, pulling, OH, pinching and ... and ... then he bends his head down and starts to suckle...no not suckle - SUCK.  I stand there...trying hard not to move, not to scream, remembering we are in an office.  BREATHE...Breathe...breathe.  Sucking Hard on one - biting, all the while pinching the other.  He plays fairly with my nipples so that he has SUCKED them both so they are feeling...intensly sensitive... YUM, Oh, ya, argh.

He straightens up and whispers in my ear, "That was a good girl." My stomach free falls.  "You were silent fiona.  I am very proud of you.  You usually make so much noise, I had to be sure you could be quiet."  He kisses my ear.  "Now, come here."  Unceremoniously, he walks over to his desk and sits on his chair.  My bra is hanging out of my sleeves down my arms, my shirt is up over my breasts and my now enormous nipples, and my scarf is still tightly wound around my throat.  I walk over between his legs standing between his chair and his desk.  He pushes me down to my knees and grabs my scarf and pulls me to him.  He leans down so that once again his lips are next to my ear.  "You have been such a good girl, but I need a quick break and then I need to get back to work.  I will play with you later - at home.  Do you understand?"  I shake my head. "Good girl, fiona, now remember - you must be silent.  I.  Am.  At. Work."  He leans up and kisses my forehead then tightens the scarf and leans down once again and growls low,  "Do.  Not.  Let a single drip.  Escape!"

With that, he unzips his pants, and releases his hard cock and grabs my scarf.  It is tight now, He moves the two tales of the scarf to one hand by his thigh to act as leverage, then takes his other hand and grabs a fist full of my hair and begins to fuck my mouth.  His cock is so hard, pre-cum on tip.  There is no gently kissing his cock, licking, nothing but ... ulg...gaging ...oh I musn't make a sound.  I am so focused on being quiet, on breathing quietly with that fucking scarf so tight.  Oh my, oh my.....shit I may cum from him fucking my mouth - the thrill of being used to pleasure him ... the thrill of the ... he pushes, he plunges, he, he...

All of a sudden he is cumming. I am so thoughtful to swallow, quickly.  Oh it's so warm - it squirts.  I swallow again and it's so salty.  I can't let any escape. Oh it's good.  I can't let any get on his pants.  Breath, spurt, swallow.  MMMMmmmm.  So good.  With one last grip of my hair, he holds me still, then... releases my head, my scarf and rubs my head.  He murmurs, "oh, that was so good.  That was just what I needed.  Oh, fiona, you were so...."  KNOCK KNOCK.

Shit ... Shit....  he quickly zips up his pants and pushes his chair back - un-trapping me.  I sit, shrinking down as small as I can behind his desk.  He quietly says, "Good girl, put yourself together."  and with that he strides confidently over to the door, opens it enough to walk through and shuts it.  And with that...it's over.  I've been good.  I've provided stress relief.  I did my job.  Oh who the fuck am I kidding.  I am so FUCKING HORNY I think I could explode.  I fix my clothes, my scarf and go sit down trying not to spontaneously erupt.

Smart Women, Romance Novels & D/s

So I was out looking for a graphic for my first post and I stumbled onto this article about middle aged women who want to read about sex.  So Ok - I fit that mold...I am both middle aged and - among other things, I like to read about sex.  Um, have sex... YEA - affirmation!!

Interestingly, when I went back to find the link for this post, I came across another article  titled "Why Smart Women  Read Romance Novels." When I went on to read the article, it said it was because the  "'bodice-rippers', heroes captured heroines against their will. "...types of romance novels finally went out of fashion and with the anomalous exception of 50 Shades, the new and improved modern day romance novels featured strong, smart, savvy women so now smart women wanted to read them.

So here is my issue.  I am smart.  I have always been described as strong - strong physically & mentally  oh and let's not forget OMG strong willed -sooo, ya I'm strong.  I would characterize myself as savvy about many things.  But I also like to read those  apparently OLD FASHIONED romance  novels/blogs/e-stories where   a smart, strong, savvy woman consensually and sanely exchanges her power with her dominants and gets her clothes ripped off, gets spanked, gets tied up, and  ... gets  her brains fucked out.  Now society seems to have said both historically and currently, that women who are submissive are less than.  Less than, poor us.  We are minimized, are objectified, are demeaned.  It is an atrocity committed against us...and it is considered morally wrong.  It is a pitied thing for women and a shameful thing for men.  Hmm, I neither want nor need pity.   

Now I know that there are unhealthy relationships, but as far as healthy D/s relationships go, we are safe, sane, consensual, calm, glowing and happy as ... mating bunnies  =)  

It's kind of a bummer that is have a society which says wanting pain, dominance, submission, spankings, floggings ... is wrong (my only real spankings having been given to me by my Sir).  I have also seen recent comments and posts (see June's post based off of comments on a previous post) about all women who want any of the above as having been broken or emotionally damaged in some way.  I work hard on not feeling shame or guilt (as for that past societal pressure) for wanting or even asking for a spanking.  I know there are many of us submissive out here who love spankings, who like pain, who crave dominance and we are strong, smart, savvy,  competent and dare I say productive members of society...so WTF?

Regular Night...or Not

The evening started in the most innocuous way...We had both come to bed.  The television was on, He was watching the end of the football game.  I laid across the end of the bed - He was laying perpendicular to me with His feet off the bed.  After a few minutes, He laid His feet across my back.  I have never been a footstool or any other piece of human furniture, but I loved Him laying His feet on me.  He watched and I rested.  Periodically, I tried to get up, start to talk, move or readjust and every time He pushed my body back down with His legs, He told me to be quiet.  What started as a relaxing vanilla night quickly changed - with no explanation, discussion or negotiation, it changed.  He was exerting His power, I was happily giving my power - I was put in my place.

He got up and finished getting ready for bed and I simply lay where I had been.  He came back into the bedroom where I was expecting Him to get back into bed.

**SMACK**

"OUCH!"  That blasted brush.  Erg, I hate that thing.  He wasn't any too soft either.

smack, smack, smack, smack - came softer hits in quick order.  Just as I was starting to squirm and mmmmm a bit, He hit again with a SMACK, smack, smack, smack, smack.  I squirm, I moan, I, i, i... loose all though. SMACK, smack, smack, smack.

As quickly as He began His assault, He ends it as well.  He lay on the other side of the bed, put His hands behind His head as if surveying His kingdom.  "You should see your ass.  You needed that, didn't you. (notice how that isn't a question)

Come here," He said but looked at me and then to His bulging cock.  I quickly scrambled to lick, kiss and suck.  Oh how I love the feel of that silky hardness in my mouth.  He pulled my hips so my ass was at striking distance.  He proceeded to spank, open handed while I sucked.  Oh - it seemed as if it went on for forever.  I love to have His cock in my mouth - love to hear Him say what a good girl I am, how nice and red my ass is - how warm it feels as He rubs after a particularly hard strike.

"I want to watch something for a few minutes, just keep it in your mouth - no sucking," He says.  He pushes my body down so He can see over me and my mouth stays as a warming blanket on His cock.  He ignores me for a brief period while He enjoys something else.

Time passes.

He grabs a fist full of my hair - pulling.  Funny thing with me...there is a string between my hair and my pussy.  When He pulls, I tingle, I can feel myself get wet, I moan with my mouth around His cock.  He fucks my mouth - at His pace - my job is to keep up.  I moan, grown, suck, slurp.  Oh, Oh, OH.

"You are such a good girl!  Come here." He says pulling me up by my hair so I am on top of Him with my ear next to His mouth.  He puts His hand behind my head and His other on my nipple.

"Get on me, NOW!" He says in a quiet, low voice as I start to slide down on Him.  He slams up into me causing me to cry out.  Oh my.  He pulls on my nipples, rolling, pinching as He crashes into me - again and again.   He tortures my nipples seemingly in time to each stroke.  He is fucking me so hard.  My mind is all sensation and stars.  Every time I try to move, He tightens His grip on my head, on my nipples and I am exhilarated.  I am nothing but a toy, He is pleasuring Himself with my body and my complete arousal is a happy byproduct.

Starting from the Middle

Hmmm...so where to start.  

I feel like I am walking into a 

book store that I have been to a 

thousand times and opening a book 

in the middle to start a story...

my story.

 I have been reading sex blogs for a while now and, I'm hooked.  I have never blogged and had no intention of blogging.  Until now, but I wonder if I have anything to add, anything to say that is worth anyone reading.  I am in the middle.  I am in the middle of my life, in the middle of my relationship with my Sir, my husband, my love.   I am in the middle of discovering me.  I have learned something very interesting about myself along my path of discovery.  I am a very verbal person, but I express myself better, sometimes, in writing.  When I am embarrassed, find something difficult or emotional to say, I can more easily convey what I am trying to say through written words.  This blog is for me to say what I am thinking and feeling, share my exploration of M/s and TTWD and document where I am - right now - smack dab in the middle.